In The End
by Muzica-chan
Summary: Everything has to come to and end, but what happens when it is reached and things don't begin again? Can we just give in?  ReidxMorgan
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing! D= Reid, Morgan, and the rest of the Criminal Mind's series belongs to some other fortunate soul. If it was mine, ReidxMorgan would not just be in those cute moments of bromance! XD

Summary: _When everything ends and there is no way for it to begin again, what do we do when we can't give in?_

Warning: Seriously, this is ReidxMorgan, which means boys love. This first part is just them talking, but the second part has some mature stuff. If you aren't comfortable with it, don't read on.  
Oh, and this is a tad angsty.  
Spoilers for season 6!

Author's Note: I wrote this shortly after watching 6x18. Since Prentiss was one of my favorites, you can imagine that I was a bit depressed and here is the results. =D

* * *

For months, they had not been together. It was not that they had fallen out of love, nor had they had a fight. Nothing new had separated them, neither abrupt physical distances nor life's demands growing more intent. The past few days had been utter hell, but even before that they hadn't been together.

There was no reason behind it. They just had not been together.

Except for work, but then again, work was where they had met and it was where they would always be fated to meet again.

Doubtlessly, it was far from the most romantic place, and it would never be the most private. Despite that, the BAU always had and always would be where they fitted together the best. There was their beginning and where they were the most dynamic, working as a team to save someone else.

That dynamic was what had made them enviable, but here, in the privacy of the grand bedroom that had witnessed their romantic moments, neither felt more than a lack of self worth.

The younger of the two was perched on the edge of the bed and stared at his hands, trying to process what he was feeling. He knew what grief was, knew exactly what chemicals were dulling his senses and influencing his thoughts, and could describe in detail what created everything he was sensing.

For him, it wasn't just easy to compute the 'why' of his feelings, it was nature. However, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't understand the 'what.'

The older of the two slouched against the head board in the middle of the bed with his eyes focused solely on the wall straight ahead. His legs were halfway drawn up to his chest with his arms lying over them as his mind focused on trying to fixate on nothing. The only thing he wanted was to not think, to no longer feel, and it was no meager task to block it all out.

All he felt up to was trying to ignore his own mind and emotions. The two were just a downward spiral that was slowly tearing him apart. The mourning just wasn't helping him. It was hurting.

Neither male knew why that had gone there. Neither could figure out why they were poisoning this place with the dark feelings. Neither understood why they were both there.

The place had always been their haven. It was where they could hide from the demons, where they could shamelessly enjoy the simplest joys of life together, and where they were safe from the dark that existed everywhere else in their lives.

A few months earlier, they had gone there as often as their work schedules permitted. Then something had changed and it had been all but abandoned...and now they had returned just to pollute it by sitting in agonizing silence.

Slow but consistent, the quiet grew denser, harsher, grew to be too much. It screamed of the need to be ended, to be broken, and to be filled with the simple happiness that belonged in such a place. Even if there was no way for happiness to come, the pain did have to end, and since there was no statistic, theory, or pretty quote to be shared and sum it all up, Morgan was the one that had to speak first.

"When...When Rossi and I were at her place...we...I kept thinking, 'what else? What else are we missing? What else don't we know? What else don't I know? What else has she been hiding from us?' I felt...suspicious...betrayed...I didn't want to admit that after five years, something like that could make me not trust her completely," he confessed, speaking aloud the thoughts and feelings that had been plaguing him.

Reid watched wordlessly as he lifted his hands briefly in a hopeless gesture, only to let them fall back between his knees, as if the effort to keep them suspended was too much. The strong, alpha male seemed so weak and so lost.

Yet, his voice was impossibly steady as he told the other, "I didn't want to believe that she would just leave us. I wanted it to be more than that."

Though the dark face remained hopeless and nearly vacant, the pale face twisted slightly. Reid struggled to force the tears back once again. Already, he had wept more than any time before. It was to the point that the mere thought of shedding more tears was far from appealing.

All he wanted was to put forth a strong façade.

At first, this front had just been for himself, to protect himself from the comfort of those that were hurting as well. Now, he was acting strong for Morgan as well. It was nearly ironic. The older male had always been saving face for his junior's sake, and now it was reversed.

Clearing his throat, he fought against the lump in his throat as he told Morgan softly, "In the end...it was more." His eyes traveled away from his hands, his gaze shifting over his shoulder to focus on the other man as his thumbs over the short stumps of his finger nails. Some twisted, inner being had driven him to mimic the habit, and already he was regretting giving in to the urge. Meeting the obsidian gaze, he continued, "It was for a child whose future relied on her...a-and it was for us...to protect us."

Though he nodded along in mindless agreement, it was obvious that Morgan still couldn't accept it. In his heart and his mind, there could have been another way. Resolutely, he answered, "I know. I know that. I really do...but at the same time...I can't fucking believe that she didn't trust us enough to help. Why couldn't she just let us help?"

"Would you?"

The two words didn't receive or need an answer. Morgan had already proven that when it came to the team's safety, he would put himself second every single time.

That did not mean he had to be understanding when someone else did the same.

Sounding frustrated and oddly desperate, he muttered, "I know! I know that, but I can't believe she just left us in the dark and just left us completely, running off to go and die! She wasn't supposed to! She was supposed to come back! Then we could have solved the case together and after we could have been mad at her and we could have ignored her at the conference table and made her get us coffee to apologize and then gotten over it because we're a family! Now she is gone and all I have left is this vague feeling that there had to be one damn thing, just one that I could have done to make a difference! It is not fair!"

As the dark male had gone on, his tone had risen, nearly to a shout. Abruptly he bit off his ranting, and Reid could practically feel his lover's shock as he wrapped his arms around Morgan's, entrapping and cradling him.

Even if he mentally recoiled at the angry tone and even if he was normal never so bold as to reach out, he couldn't just sit there while Morgan screamed for support.

Pressing his face into the juncture between Morgan's neck and shoulder, his arms remained tight around the other as he continued his battle to not cry. His lithe body shook and his voice cracked with emotion as he whispered, "I-I know, god do I know, Morgan. A lot of things were supposed to happen that never did. There-there is so much that it feels like we could have done, but there is nothing we can do but move on and stay strong. W-we have to believe that everything that is done is done and move one or the past will consume us."

Silently quarreling with the tears, the silence went unnoticed. The duration of aching quite passed without note...at least until it was broken.

Morgan's hands shifted to rest on Reid's back, pulling him closer. The strong fingers curled in the flimsy fabric, and as he held him there, he asked softly, "Why? Why can we never catch a break?"

Inhaling deeply, the young genius steadied himself to speak...only to find that he had no words.

Logically, he could explain to himself that the average number of "breaks" they caught was considerably larger than those they did. Even though he knew it was just short of fact, he couldn't make himself believe it. It just didn't seem like it could be true.

It felt like the whole world was always slowly shattering around them. Every time he turned around, it was like something was missing or broken. The loss never seemed to end.

"I don't know," Reid whispered. Burying his face in the other's shoulder, he shook his head slightly and admitted weakly, "I-I just...don't know anymore."

Now reduced to praying that the tears wouldn't fall, he felt the hold on him tighten and Reid clung to Morgan. The male had saved his life and had saved his sanity a million times over. Just by being his friend, he had found strength. He willed for that to be enough to save him once again.

With a terrifying certainty, he felt that this time it wouldn't be.

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A/N: I suck! D= A sad ending? That is so not cool!  
Fear not! =D Part two is coming out. Not sure, yet, if it will be happy or not, but it is pretty likely to be mature.

Anyway, Hope that you liked it! :D View and review! What did you like? What did you hate? What could be improved?

Thanks for reading and I hope that you add me to your alerts so that you can enjoy more of my Reid and Morgan obsession. XD


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: This chapter is a direct continuation of the previous chapter, but it is from Morgan's POV. It takes place directly before episode nineteen of season six.

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Never before, not even after all the crap his teen years had put him through, had Morgan felt as hopeless than he did in that moment. If even the brilliant doctor Reid couldn't give him an answer, it made him wonder if there was actually one out there.

Was there any answer to why everything had fallen so squarely on his team and him?

Was there any reason as to why they were chosen to suffer, when they all sacrificed so much to protect the innocent?

Was there any logic behind all of the trials that befell them?

Was there any sense to why moving on was their only option?

Was there any answer in the future?

Squeezing his eyes shut, his grasp on the lithe male tightened. Relentlessly, his mind reeled for the answer, an answer, any answer. At that moment, he needed some sort of reason, something that he could steady himself with. He needed facts, and for once, Reid wasn't able to offer him what he wanted to know.

The near black hues opened as a surprising thought occurred to him.

He was wrong. Reid had given him an answer, because he, himself, was the reason. So long as he was there, he created logic in moving on, in not giving up completely. Though he was no answer as to why such hardships befell them, he was more than enough reason to see sense in continuing through them.

Thinking such things made his heart slow for a moment before it began pounding. Hope touched him for the first time in a long time, and it didn't let him go.

Gently, Morgan nudged his pale lover away so that he could see his face. Brushing his thumbs over those high, delicate cheek bones, some part of him was astonished to see no tears, and it was all that was needed to cause a real smile to grace the devilishly handsome features.

After such a long period of abstinence from each other, he had been expecting to feel trepidation when such a moment came. All Morgan felt, however, was a simple, innocent joy as his lips brush lightly against Reid's. The light touch was enough to send relief coursing through him.

It felt so right to be kissing the other again, because any amount of time apart was too long...and this time truly had been too long.

The kiss was chaste, barely enough to qualify as real contact, but with relief came breathlessness. Something about the tender warmth always managed to steal the air from his lungs.

No matter how many women he had been with or would ever be with, not a single one of them or all of them combined could compare to Reid. In every single sense and every single way, he was Morgan's only exception. He would forever be the only male to catch his eye, and he was the only person in the world that could make Morgan feel something so intense.

That wasn't to say Reid made him feel perfect or indestructible. In no way did he or did he try to. He did make Morgan feel like the flaws and the scars were okay. He made him feel as though just breathing the same air made the dark a little less heavy. He made him feel like everything could be managed. In a peculiar way, Reid made Morgan feel safe.

Realization dawned on him that a simple kiss was not enough to convey his thoughts. Though he had gotten an epiphany, Reid's head was still as muddled as his head been.

Squeezing him close, he kissed him once more. Encouragingly, Morgan whispered, "Don't worry. You don't have to know everything, boy genius. We can figure some things out together, you hear me?"

If there were any way that he could possibly made his younger lover smile like that daily, Morgan would have done just about anything to know how.

It was tragic, to him, that the beautiful sight of Reid's smile lasted less than a heartbeat.

With a slight nod, Reid brought his hand up to rest over Morgan's on his cheek. His slender lips parted to say something, but when no words came out, that brief hope died. As his eyes drifted closed, he slowly rocked his head from side to side, the smile vanishing as if it had never been.

Morgan's heart shattered in his chest. As the jagged shards stabbed at his lungs, he couldn't help but wonder which had caused it: the twisted expression of agony on Reid's face or the crystal tears that cascaded silently over his cheeks.

Still shifting his head from side to side, Reid wrapped his arms around himself. Softly, his voice barely more than a breath, he gasped, "It won't. It won't ever make sense. Everything is falling apart. I am going to lose everyone and everything. Prentiss is dead. JJ is gone. I don't see you anymore. Things are just getting harder. Nothing is going the way it should, and I feel like I am drowning, there is no short in sight, and I don't know what to do."

"Hey!" Morgan barked, just harsh enough to get those beautiful, chocolate hues to look at him. Pressing his large hands to the pale cheeks, he tilted his forehead against' Reid's as he stared intently into those gentle, doe eyes. In a confident, serious tone, he told him, "I am right here, and I will always be right here. If there is no shore, then hold onto me until you have the strength to swim and find one, okay?"

Yet again, his lips parted but no works came out. The stunning eyes closed to block out reality and he leaned into Morgan's touch. His voice was soft and distraught as he begged, "Save me."

Morgan didn't know what he could do to save Reid and didn't know how he could pull him out of the dark waters that consisted of grief and uncertainty. All of them struggled with it. Even with his revelation, he himself was fighting still. Not content with standing on the shore and call out to his love, he plunged again into his own shadowy ocean, longing only to prove to Reid that he was not alone.

Barely giving his actions a thought, Morgan leaned forward and reconnected their lips, desperate to show him that he was right there. Reid responded eagerly, obviously longing to escape from conscious thought. As his lips moved against Morgan's, he shifted ever closer. Shifting him so that Reid was straddling his lap, Morgan shifted his hands from Reid's knees to his hips, his hands caressing him gentle.

He almost stopped as he felt the tears falling onto his face. The only reason he didn't was because as he felt the wet warmth sliding onto his cheeks, Reid's hands came up to cup his cheeks, urging him on.

Forsaking their usual slow, timid pace, the two gave into the lust and passion, a quick burning heat that could consume them both. The burning emotions that they normally stifled and kept hidden, even from each other, broke forth and made it to the surface.

In both was a great sorrow for their loss, their longing, and love. Reid also gave into the fear and the comfort of Morgan's arms, while Morgan, himself, gave into the urge to possess and protect the smaller male. They were both desperate from each other and desperate to be free, and in each other's desperation, they found what they were seeking.

Morgan felt Reid start to tugging at the hem of his shirt, and he shifted to help pull it off, breaking off the kiss. The pale male's lips returned to him on his throat, kissing down to his shoulders. A soft moan escaping him, the athletic male let his head tilt back.

With his eyes closed and he enjoyed the sensation, he struggled to undo the buttons on Reid's shirt. Not for the first time, he wondered why the young male insisted on wearing those damn dress shirts. Half the time, the buttons ended up missing-and not just because they fell off in the washing machine.

This time was a good example of how.

Knowing Morgan's body well, Reid gently nipped at one of his sweet spots, just hard enough to make Morgan jerk. The buttons popped off and flew onto the bed and clattered to the floor. They went unnoticed as he jerked the shirt off the pale shoulders and moved his ravenous mouth to the fair skin.

Biting, nipping, sucking, he cover the other's flesh with his mouth as he steadily tilted him back. Slowly, he switched their positions. He hovered over Reid, while the other sprawled on the bed.

Once more, pale arms entrapped dark shoulders, drawing their torsos close and brining his focus to those soft, brown eyes. Slowly, the gaze was hidden behind long lashes, and as he went back to his ministrations, he felt small shivers of pleasure go through the thin body. In turn, a tiny smile tilted his dusky lips.

Keeping his lips on the smooth, porcelain skin, he murmured softly, "I love you."

It was exceedingly rare for there to be any reply, and despite how badly he needed the words, he was unbothered when he realized this time was no exception.

Reid tenderly caressed Morgan's face with a smile that said more than a million words ever could. He knew that Morgan knew he recuperated the feeling. The words were just too big to be said lightly. That was what made them so much more desirable from his lips.

Moving his lover the soft skin again, one hand supported him as his other moved to caress his lover's sides and stomach lightly, never dipping low enough to even tease. Long, thin fingers ran over his shoulders and neck. The long legs were wrapped around his waist, but as Morgan moved his mouth lower, they loosened and slipped to the bed as did Reid's hands.

Feeling cocky from pleasing his lover, there was a smirk on Morgan's face as he looked up, but it vanished as soon as he noticed Reid's expression.

While the young doctor was there physically, his stare said clearly that he wasn't. The vacant look that slipped into his eyes said he had gotten the break from reality that he wanted. It told Morgan that his lover's mind was elsewhere...and that hurt him.

Discontent with just pleasing Reid's body, a soft sigh slipped from his lips as he shifted away. It was for less than a second and then he moved close again to lie next to Reid. Wrapping his arms around the brunette, he drew him against his chest and pressed his face to the soft hair. His eyes closed as he drew in the familiar scent.

Even without seeing, he knew exactly when Reid returned to reality.

"Sorry," Reid whispered softly, his hand tentative as it rose to rest over Morgan's heart.

Shaking his head and pressing himself closer to his lover, he answered just as quietly, "Don't be."

"I am."

"What's happening?"

It was a heavy question and almost difficult to ask, but before it could be given the answer it deserved, their phones went off.

Their gazes met, and pain flared in the black eyes, while the emotion was carefully guarded in the brown eyes. It could only mean one thing if they were being messaged at the same time, and they both kne wit. Work was calling them away from each other.

"I am so sorry," Reid murmured once again. Shaking his head, he fled the room before Morgan could stop him.

Groaning, he didn't follow as he should have. In only a few moments, he would have to, but he needed a moment. He needed to gather himself and just process what was going on.

Glaring up at the ceiling like it was at fault for the distance, his mind churned over everything. It was then that he realized that this was the first time that Reid had spaced out. When it was just the two of them, those russet hues followed him like he was the most beautiful creature in the world.

Feeling a new type of despair, Morgan asked the silence, "What happened to my pretty boy?"

* * *

A/N: D: Another sad ending! WTF! I suck! D:

T.T I am sorry.

I do intent to continue this to a part three though. :D I already have it planned out, but I am asking you, the readers, whose POV do you want it from? Morgan's or Reid's?

Anyway, I hope that you enjoyed this chapter and the previous one.

View and Review!

Tell me what you liked/disliked/loved/hated! What do you want to see me improve?

I hope that you'll add me to your alerts so that you can find out what happens next and enjoy more of my ReidxMorgan obsession.

On another note: I take requests on and prompts CM fanfiction with most of the pairings. (There are only 2-3 that I won't do. xD)


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